Valentine’s Day - the good, the bad and the ugly!

 One of our members shares her thoughts and perspective on Valentine's Day

I’m not a big fan of Valentine’s Day, I’ve had some bad experiences (more of that later). It’s horrible when you are not in a relationship and it’s not great if you’re in one either!

Early on I had some truly embarrassing Valentine’s experiences. It seemed like it was the day that gave extra bravery to shyer men, and I was always the recipient of it. Every year it seemed like the bloke I had been trying to avoid all year suddenly decided to declare his love for me. Maybe I’m irresistible, but I think it’s probably more like I was the one person who did take the time to talk to them and this was misinterpreted. I had innocent meals out with male friends that happened to be on Valentine’s Day, when we were serenaded and presented with roses; and mysterious cards that I never found the true origin of. The worst ever had to be when I was working late one Valentine’s to avoid the whole thing, only to be propositioned by the contractor who worked for me – a truly embarrassing situation!

When I was single Valentine’s Day just reinforced that fact, with the endless cards, smoochy music on the radio and colleagues asking what you were doing that evening.  It seemed like everyone was walking down the street hand in hand. Does nobody think how depressing it is to be single on Valentine’s Day?

In fact when I decided to be comfortable on my own, ignore the smooching couples and get on living life to the full, starting up some new hobbies and joining some clubs, I met my husband to be.  It turned out to be so true that when you are not looking, you are actually more likely to meet someone. Maybe because you don’t look quite so desperate or just the positive vibes from being comfortable in your own skin.

Having a boyfriend on Valentine’s Day threw up its own problems. For some reason he loved the whole concept, maybe because he hadn’t had such painful experiences or it was all a novelty. But from my point of view it’s one of those days when you feel pressurised to do something, restaurants put up their prices and the smultzchy tone is really not me. Valentine’s Day was less painful than in the past and actually quite entertaining when my large bunch of flowers was delivered by accident to a pensioner up the road! Fortunately the novelty to my husband has worn off and we can now agree to ignore the blasted day.

So my thoughts on Valentine’s Day? Ignore the day, be grateful for what you’ve got, live life to the full and if you have to go out on that day, take a single friend.